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The Four Agreements

Kevin — Thu, 30 Dec 2010 03:21:23 +0000

Some words of wisdom from Don Miguel Ruiz:

Be Impeccable With Your Word
Speak with integrity. Say only what you mean. Avoid using the word to speak against yourself or to gossip about others. Use the power of your word in the direction of truth and love.

Don’t Take Anything Personally
Nothing others do is because of you. What others say and do is a projection of their own reality, their own dream. When you are immune to the opinions and actions of others, you won’t be the victim of needless suffering.

Don’t Make Assumptions
Find the courage to ask questions and to express what you really want. Communicate with others as clearly as you can to avoid misunderstandings, sadness and drama. With just this one agreement, you can completely transform your life.

Always Do Your Best
Your best is going to change from moment to moment; it will be different when you are healthy as opposed to sick. Under any circumstance, simply do your best, and you will avoid self-judgment, self-abuse and regret.

Check out my swag

Kevin — Fri, 20 Mar 2009 06:42:37 +0000

Tonight I attended an event where students of the High School of the Recording Arts performed. Hip hop and R&B stuff. A couple of repeated themes were to get your hands in the air and swag. “Swag” — my new term of the day. Not sure I fully get it, but I think it means who you are and how you present yourself, more or less, with a predilection for your swaggering self, but just be you, man, no matter who you are. Don’t be me, be you.

It’s like blogging but with a beat: Check. Out. My. Swag.

The other story is that this is a charter school in St Paul that is getting HS degrees to kids that otherwise probably wouldn’t. Smart, capable kids. Pretty awesome, glad to have attended and to have put my hands in the air.

Clothes make the man

Kevin — Fri, 20 Feb 2009 07:26:42 +0000

This evening, I am out and about in my suit. I’ve got an audition as a lawyer and then I’m going to the opera, plus the weather is ideal for wearing a jacket. I must look the part: two older gentlemen told me so in plain English. On the Red Line platform he even said I looked “Beverly Hills.” Downtown awaiting the DASH B Line, it was just, “You’re a lawyer, aren’t you?” These men were probably a little crazy and a little needy in a way that I couldn’t help them. Or maybe they just wanted to chat. I was terse in my replies, but at least I replied — which I normally do not do at all to street people — so I guess I took these comments as compliments.

Yesterday, I shared my apartment elevator one floor with a guy who complimented me on my clothes. Actually, what he said was, “Mmm, J. Crew, right?” As I looked down to see what I was wearing (no need to look down, but it’s an almost involuntary response, isn’t it?), I realized that I had on pants, tee, dress shirt and sweater vest from Banana Republic. Four from BR, but no J. Crew. I sized him up: well-dressed and chatting me up, probably gay. But not gay well-dressed, no gay mannerisms or stereotypes at all. Plus, what gay man doesn’t know the difference between J. Crew and Banana Republic? So, straight.