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I just received an email from Delta Air Lines, that begins as follows:

Dear Kevin Ashworth,
We are trying to contact you because our flight has cancelled. We have rebooked you on the best available flight and we’ll keep trying to reach you by phone.

What’s wrong with this? Doesn’t one syntax thing jump out at you immediately? My inner grammar cop says this is wrong. Maybe it’s just industry jargon. Maybe they’re British. I mean, let’s talk about how many l’s this word has. Or maybe it’s just plain wrong!

Cancel is a transitive verb, meaning it requires a subject and an object, no matter how it’s spelled (one l in America). My flight has canceled? Not so much. Something canceled my flight. What or who could that something be?

An open letter to James C. Taylor, host of Theatre Talk on KCRW:

Dear Mr. Taylor,

Your insight and coverage are commendable. I listen regularly for valuable commentary on the American theater. There is one important thing you should know about the English language, however. The phrase “Theatre Talk” has four syllables when spoken aloud.

Respectfully,

Kevin Ashworth

There’s a very successful voiceover guy out there who consistently and egregiously mispronounces the word authentic. He says, more or less, “uhthentic.” It’s pretty horrible.

This raises some questions:

1. Where is he from? Ans: Possibly Chicago.
1a. If indeed Chicago: Do lots of Chicagoans misspeak thus?
2. If a major talent can butcher the language, does this bode well for lowly me, who must also butcher certain sounds due to my sheltered upbringing?
2a. If yes: Why don’t I feel better about this?
2b. If no: Is that because my regionalisms don’t count as much because I come from a place that’s less populated?

In all, I really don’t care about these Q’s & A’s as much as I want him to stop mispronouncing that word on his prominent web site slash podcast thingies. Et’s pritty harrible.